Dogs and Children: Creating Safe and Positive Interactions

Dogs and children can build wonderful relationships, but ensuring their interactions are safe, respectful, and positive requires awareness and management. Many incidents occur not because a dog is aggressive, but because their signals are ignored or misunderstood. Dogs communicate their comfort levels through body language, and as guardians, it’s our responsibility to recognise these signs and create an environment where both dogs and children feel safe.

Understanding Canine Communication

Dogs do not use words to express discomfort—they rely on subtle body language cues. Many of these signals are often missed, or worse, ignored, which can lead to escalated responses such as growling or snapping.

Signs a Dog is Uncomfortable:

⚠️ Lip licking, yawning, or sudden sniffing – stress indicators.
⚠️ Turning their head away or walking off – attempting to disengage.
⚠️ Freezing or stiffening – a sign of tension or uncertainty.
⚠️ Tucked tail, pinned ears, or wide eyes – signs of fear or discomfort.

These early warning signs are a dog’s way of communicating that they need space. If they are continuously ignored, the dog may feel they have no choice but to escalate their response.

Giving Dogs Choice and Agency

Dogs should never be forced to interact with children. Just because a dog tolerates handling doesn’t mean they enjoy it. Many dogs will put up with discomfort until they reach a breaking point.

How to Give Dogs More Control Over Interactions:

✔️ Allow the dog to approach on their own terms rather than being forced into interactions.
✔️ Ensure they have the option to move away and that children respect this choice.
✔️ Create a safe space where the dog can retreat without being followed.
✔️ Teach children that when a dog moves away, they must be left alone.
✔️ Blowing Kisses or waving - Encourage your children to blow your dogs kisses or wave to show affection.

When dogs know they have the choice to disengage, they feel safer and are less likely to resort to more extreme communication like growling or snapping.

Why Supervision Alone is Not Enough

Many incidents occur even when an adult is present because supervision isn’t just about being in the same room—it’s about active management.

🔹 Watching interactions closely and stepping in before a situation escalates.
🔹 Recognising stress signals and removing the dog before discomfort turns to fear.
🔹 Ensuring that children understand and respect the dog’s boundaries.

A common misconception is that because a dog has "always been great with kids," they will never react negatively. But just like humans, dogs have limits, and stress or exhaustion can change their tolerance levels.

How Repeated Stress Leads to Incidents

Many families report that their dog was "fine all weekend" before an incident occurred on a Sunday night. This is often because the dog has been enduring interactions they find stressful, but their signals have gone unnoticed.

🚨 How Escalation Happens:
1️⃣ The dog turns away or moves to another space.
2️⃣ The child follows, continuing the interaction.
3️⃣ The dog licks their lips, yawns, or tenses up.
4️⃣ The child continues, possibly grabbing or leaning on the dog.
5️⃣ The dog growls—often their last warning before escalating further.

Growling is communication, not defiance. If a dog is growling, they are asking for space. Punishing a dog for growling removes their ability to warn and makes escalation to a bite more likely.

Creating a Safe Environment for Dogs and Children

Proper management is key to preventing unnecessary stress and avoiding potentially dangerous situations. Setting up a structured environment can help keep interactions safe and positive.

Ways to Safeguard Interactions:

✔️ Use baby gates, playpens, or separate rooms to give the dog space.
✔️ Create dog-free zones where children cannot follow them.
✔️ Supervise interactions closely and remove the dog if needed.
✔️ Never allow rough play, tail pulling, or climbing on the dog.

Dogs should have the opportunity to rest and decompress without constant attention from children. Creating safe spaces ensures that interactions remain positive and stress-free.

Educating Children on Safe Dog Interactions

Children often don’t intend to harm dogs, but their natural curiosity can lead to unintentional stress or even injury. Teaching children how to interact respectfully is essential.

🚫 No hugging or climbing on dogs.
🚫 No pulling tails, ears, or fur.
🚫 No disturbing a sleeping dog.
🚫 No bothering a dog while eating or chewing.
🚫 No chasing a dog when they try to move away.

Instead, encourage children to:
✔️ Offer a dog a treat rather than reaching for them.
✔️ Allow the dog to approach rather than running up to them.
✔️ Use calm, gentle strokes rather than grabbing or patting.

When children learn to respect a dog’s space, trust is built, and interactions become safer and more enjoyable for both.

Being Your Dog’s Advocate

Dogs rely on their guardians to step in when they are uncomfortable. If a dog is constantly expected to tolerate stressful interactions, they will eventually feel they have no choice but to communicate more clearly.

Advocating for Your Dog Means:

🔹 Removing them from interactions before they become overwhelmed.
🔹 Politely telling others to give the dog space.
🔹 Never allowing children or guests to force interactions.
🔹 Educating others on dog body language and appropriate behaviour.

If a dog shows discomfort, step in and remove them before things escalate. A well-meaning person might say, "Oh, don’t worry, I love dogs!" but the focus should be on whether the dog is comfortable.

Final Thoughts

Dogs and children can build beautiful relationships, but it’s our responsibility to make sure those relationships are built on trust, respect, and understanding. No dog should be expected to tolerate discomfort simply because they are "good with kids."

By recognising canine body language, giving dogs control over interactions, and setting up a safe environment, we can ensure that both children and dogs are protected from unnecessary stress.

Understanding dog behaviour isn’t just about preventing incidents—it’s about fostering safe, happy, and fulfilling relationships between dogs and the families they live with.